Current Energy~ Chapter 1 (Intolerance)

The current energy is working through creating balance between mind, body and soul.  The harmonising of all 3, cements the space of cracks, that made room for its fragmentation in the first place.

The feeling of imbalance is a tell tale sign that decentralisation is in the mix. That isn’t a good thing to me, as it means ones power or self agency is for grabs. As if imbalance is an invitation for ego to come make a play for power. This is why when we feel balanced we feel inner peace.  We know our self agency is in great hands with our soul, because it’s the soul that is motivated towards completion,  as opposed to ego that’s motivated towards survival.

These differences in motivation matter a great deal because principle wise, I can trust someone motivated towards completion with power over resolution than someone motivated by survival.

When fragmentation occurs between the mind and body, a state of disorientation follows.  To get lost in that state creates a risk akin to decomposition of  the neglected part. It’s a risk because it just means it regenerates itself more powerfully, which is how suffering occurs.

When you feel imbalance, it  can at times mean you are giving attention and service to one part of you over another and so you catch a case. I said “at times” because generally imbalance is a sign that something is missing, something worth receiving.  That something is in the midst of the complaint in the case you caught so its about deciphering what the complaint is and opting for wanting to cater to it the right way.

The epiphanies I have are all connected to this. It all started with a neighbour I felt compassion for but that has low key been annoying me.

What ever it is that this lady is reflecting back, I find it very healing that love is present.  I trust the emotional ‘toil’ of it all is not without purpose. The toil isn’t because of her,  it’s happening within.

Her nature exposed an imbalance I find interesting and it’s the make up of it all I’m intrigued by.

There is something about her connected to my soul mission that Allah is using through his meticulous wisdom to assist my inner alchemy.

Whats ‘funny’ is there is another neighbour who tries to bond with me through gossip about her ways lol I’m like go away ibleesa at least the other is authentic and teaching me the imbalance in my tolerance about others behaviour.

LOL! subhanallah that’s what it is!

Inalilaah how does matter go full circle as I wrote the above! See this is why writing helps me. I was going to delete that last paragraph about the gossipy neighbour, because looking at it now my ego tried to suggest things about sharing that. My intuition said “no it matters” so I trusted that and look where it led subhanallah

I’m genuinely smiling alhamdulilaah, this isn’t just about the basic point of tolerance connected to behaviour. I’ve summarised a lot but it’s about the harmonising I mentioned in beginning of post. It’s about learning to communicate with all aspects of mind body and soul to assist its integration even more.

Normally things I’m annoyed by I understand why and thus accept it. It’s an intolerance that’s stirring the pot yes but I have the freedom to act on it or not.

In this case I had internal conflict enter equation. On the one hand is what the person does, on the other is how I feel about it and some where on the outskirts is what I think.

In combination of all the above I didn’t understand thus not able to accept it. It was this affect that awoke my interest. Like what’s going on here then.. sort of thing.

Through communicating with all aspects of me and holding space to listen and receive, I found it not being about who I am, as I do, what’s from me. But it was more about accepting and loving all parts of me unconditionally,  through understanding what I feel and what I need are a central part of me. This is why Allah used a matter that honed in on my compassion vs annoyance, it flipped every time to my compassion taming my annoyance.

The compassion was from a soul space it has understanding wisdom and grace it holds my dislikes in a balanced way. The annoyance was from an ego place and wanted to use my dislike to execute its safety agenda but at the expense of my hearts desire. ironically what caused me to notice the imbalance in the first place was the annoyance I felt.

I allowed it to exist in peace within me and in doing so alhamdulilaah I was able to recognise by Allah’s mercy, that there is more to this.

and there was..

I’ll revisit this, as chapter two unfolds, I think it will but for now I need to absorb what is.